A little less informative and a bit more personal.
As soon as I step onto the mat my mind naturally plays out a train of thoughts and reactions to what I’m experiencing within the frame of movement, breath and space. How I feel that day, mentally and physically. What I project into the world and what has made an impression on me. What has passed and what I anticipate. I will think that this practice is hard, makes me tired and I will feel that it makes me persevering and strong at the same time. It heals and shatters me alike. Surges of energy will push through leaving me ecstatic, euphoric and then seize into the deepest sense of calm. What I feel will make me want to share the many lessons and it makes me want to become very, very still.
Practice can truly leave you feeling frustrated, defeated, also powerful and at peace. You can always choose how you respond to what you’re presented to deal with today, but you can’t decide on what that is going to be. It’s not like playing the motivational work-out song in the gym to go bigger, better, bolder; not like having a good espresso before work.
That’s not why we practice. We practice to see. To allow what presents itself and react in the best of our ability. The lesson is always honesty, commitment and surrender. By truly seeing yourself in every moment of the process you are able to see and navigate the lessons learned on the mat through the rest of your life. By being aware of your exposed mind you can respond to challenges, relationships and experiences with more care, attention and discernment.
A sound body, a centered mind and physical health is the beautiful by-product of practice, rather than the motivation to attain this. I’ve felt torn, raptured, liberated and exhilarated, never experienced a deeper peace and a more excruciating pain of facing internal hurt. I have never been more comfortable in my skin or never been more awe-struck and mind-shattered by the illusion of who I think I am than in the frame of practice.
What I appreciate about this practice is that it’s so experiential and evident. No amount of theory or thought, no scripture or text could ever imply what you learn and unravel through its direct experience. You have to get out of your own head, let go of your own limited ideas of what you believe is attainable or not. You have to go through the process and devote yourself to this work that mirrors your deepest strengths and weaknesses.
Just a taste of the elixir of its healing capacity, just a glimpse into the the expansion of the mind’s potential can leave you forever transformed. When all that you can grasp is the temporary feeling of light and humility after practice, then it’s working for you. Through you.
When you practice, your world changes; you begin to clear away from what held you trapped and you begin to understand that the spiritual essence of who you are can never be shaken.
Eva Eichhorn 